Visa Woes: Colombia Said No
This was my third time in Colombia. Apparently, the third time’s not the charm.
After three months exploring Medellín, Armenia, and Cali, I thought I’d stay. But Colombia said, “Thanks for visiting. Please proceed to the exit now.”
Let’s Rewind
The first time, I was in Bogotá in 2022—but I cut that trip short. Why? Because I got a loud nudge from the universe telling me to return to the U.S. and repair my relationship with my mom. I did it, reluctantly. This expensive and unexpected detour in my sabbatical wasn’t what I wanted, but it was what I needed. No regrets. Zero. Thanks Mama Aya.
Bogotá’s altitude and chilly vibes weren’t really my thing anyway, so on my second visit, I tried Medellín. The weather was better, the vibe more vibrant… until I got followed by an aggressive (presumably unhoused) man who wanted my Starbucks—and wouldn’t take no for an answer. (Two block later, he eventually settled for my bottled water.) A similar incident near my Airbnb was interrupted by a nearby security guard I’d befriended.
I started to wonder: do I give off “I’m an easy target” energy? Whatever it was, I decided not to stick around and find out. One-way tickets mean I can pivot when I need to. Yay!
Round 3
After my original move-abroad-with-a-friend plan fell apart (see story here), I regrouped. I picked three countries I could maybe afford solo. Colombia was the closest to where I was (Mexico City), so here I am again in 2025.
This time, I committed: three months, three cities, and a mission to find “home.”
First up: Medellín again, but this time in the Laureles neighborhood. Way more my speed than tourist-heavy El Poblado. It was walkable and vibrant, even if Medellín’s “Land of Eternal Spring” felt more like Eternal Summer.
Then came Armenia. A cooler climate (gracias) and a slower pace. But my Spanish would need a serious upgrade to thrive that far off the tourist track.
Last stop: Cali. The city of Calena salsa, where songs are nine minutes long and dancers move like they’re auditioning for a Fast & Furious reboot. Locals lovingly teased me that I should try the viejoteca—aka the disco for older salseros like me. Still…Cali won.
I started planning my new life.
Visa Dreams, Meet Bureaucracy
First attempt? Retirement visa. I qualified by age and income amount. But… surprise! My income wasn’t the right kind. Because it wasn’t from a government-backed pension, it didn’t count. My income was considered “passive,” which meant I needed to show proof of earning about $3,500 USD per month.
Spoiler: I don’t make that anymore…yet.
So I pivoted again. Student visa? I found a qualifying school and was ready to enroll.
But they told me I still needed to prove that same $3,500 monthly income—on top of paying for classes.
A much-suggested Plan C, was “find a nice Colombian to marry” or “just overstay your visa”. Uh… hard pass. I wasn’t that in love with Colombia. And honestly, I give off nervous “please catch me, I’m doing something illegal” energy. The kind that customs dogs sniff out instantly. I would never be able to relax—not to mention, I don’t have “get caught” money.
Overstay fines start around $250 USD and can climb incrementally into the thousands depending on how long you stick around. Well, at least it’s not Singapore. Overstay there and you could get fined, banned, and possibly caned. (Not the sexy kind with mood lighting and a warm-up, if ya know what I mean.)
Starting Again—Again
So here I am at Plan D (okay, at this point it’s probably Plan M). My 3-month tourist visa was about to expire and the glitchy extension website foiled my plan to get a 3-month extension. So I took three panic-fueled days to slam through options
My criteria:
- Affordability on my current budget
- Long tourist visa stays
- Safe for us LGBTQ+ folks
- Minimal “burning sun” since my skin acts up like a drama queen
Lima, Peru came out on top.
✨Final Thoughts
So… I’m leaving Colombia. Not because I wanted to. Because I had to.
Next stop: land of ceviche and causa, ancient ruins, and hopefully another chance to regroup.
Will the dream evolve into something entirely new? or die a sad, disappointing death?
Stick around. I’ll let report back from Lima.
📝 Have you tried to stay long-term somewhere and it didn’t work out? What was your next step? Drop your stories, visa hacks, or “well THAT backfired” moments in the comments. I’d love to hear how you handled it.
I loved this post. you are brave AF! Looking forward to hearing about Lima!
Brave. From the inside it doesn’t feel very brave. But I’m sure I’ll see it when I’m on the other side.